Today I’m bringing you the very best of Covid Rules and explaining the complicated science behind them, wrote James Macpherson. “We were treated like idiots for two years. We must never, ever forget.”
Below is Macpherson’s list of Covid Rules and “the science.”
1. Covid Rule
We had to wear masks when entering a restaurant and walking to the table, but were allowed to remove the mask when seated at the table. Mask had to be reapplied in order to leave.
The Science: The Covid doesn’t spread when you’re eating and drinking.
2. Covid Rule
No one was allowed out in public except to riot over the death of George Floyd.
The Science: A pandemic of racism (yes that’s actually what some media called it) was more deadly than an actual pandemic.
3. Covid Rule:
Curfews.
The Science: The Covid can tell time.
4. Covid Rule:
In Ohio, the sport of wrestling was permitted but competitors were not allowed to shake hands at the end of the bout.
The Science: The Covid hated good sports.
5. Covid Rule:
Melbourne residents were told it was “not in the spirit of the lockdown” to watch the sunset.
The Science: The Covid kept a list of people who glanced at the setting sun and eventually infected them.
6. Covid Rule:
People walking alone on secluded beaches were arrested.
The Science: An infected walker could infect grains of sand, or possibly even fish....<<<Read More>>>...